What to do?

Austin informed me tonight that he wants to quit soccer. He was on the verge of tears, all because some of the little shits players on his team are being…well…little shits.

For the past few practices and games, he’s been on the receiving end of comments like “you suck at soccer!” and the like. The coaches are nice guys, but they’re either deaf and dumb or they don’t give a fuck. To top it off, I heard from another mom in the division that last Saturday’s game between our team and hers was, to quote her, “a blood bath.” Niiiice. All these kids know each other because it’s a small town, and they can’t seem to bear the thought of losing to each other. So they get violent instead. Add a new and slightly ineffectual referee into the mix, and things will (and did) get ugly.

So. Rock meet hard place. While part of me wants to encourage him to fulfill the commitment he made to the team, and not to let other people ruin his fun, the other part of me thinks that tears after soccer practice - not even a game! - is just fucking ridiculous.

Of course, that part also wants to drop-kick the little shits into next week, and ask their parents if they purposely taught their kids to be assclowns. If they’re proud that their kids made mine cry.

The monkey.

Considering I call him a monkey regularly, it seems fitting that Jack’s treatment room at the child-centric dental practice was the Monkey Room.  Because of his dental issues, we were referred to this practice, and I grudgingly admit it was worth the money.  The dentist and all but one of the assistants talk a little too “happy happy we’re just big kids” for me, but whatever.  Kids seem to like it.

Jack had an oral sedative, and then we sat around for an hour.  Once in the room, he chose the flavour of nitrous gas (watermelon), donned his sunglasses and a pulse-ox meter, and away they went.  Honestly, he did really well.  So well that I can keep up the hope that one day, just maybe, he’ll be able to have fillings at our dentist.  The one who doesn’t charge more.

Overall, I think we’re out of pocket about $200.  I can write that off, plus mileage and meals, on our taxes next year.  Woo!

Now we’re back at my parents’ place, and he’s got a frozen mouth, but he’s good.

My kind of procreation.

At last, at long, long last:  someone else in my immediate family (ok, it’s the outlaws, but I like them, and it counts because I say so) is having a baby.  Yep.  No longer will I be the only one who has provided the coveted grandchildren.  (yes, I know D had something to do with it - the credit, however, is mine, due to the discrepancy between the effort expended by each of us)

As of this morning, my sister in law is in labour.  I have no clue when Baby AB might make his/her appearance (omigod, how fucking GREAT would a girl be?!), but I am stoked.  My inlaws will finally have a grandbaby within a realistic distance.  My MIL actually made a point of telling me my two are “the firsts” and won’t be ignored - like I thought that was a possibility.  Honestly, my kids are 9 and 5, and a whole different ball game than a new baby; incidentally, I do love my friend’s description of babies:  Jello with eyes.  At least for the first few months.

I finally get to be an auntie.  For REALZ.  WooT!

OMGIamnotreadyforthis.

Austin likes a girl.

As in, likes a girl.  As in, he’d love for her to be his girlfriend.

I know, I know.  “Girlfriend” is merely a title at this age.

Still.  I am not quite prepared.

The hits just keep on coming….

It’s fun times around this place.  No, really.

Jack has this weird reappearing/disappearing fever thing going on.  Friday night = fever.  Saturday = nothing.  Sunday night = fever.  Monday night = nothing (well, it was really low, and was gone all day).  Tonight = fever.  Tomorrow = DOCTOR.  The child slept 16 hours on Friday night, was passed out on the couch at 6:30 last night, and has been asleep for over an hour tonight.  Gahhh.

We couldn’t take our usual route home yesterday due to a rock slide.  Had to take the toll highway, which is just annoying.  And takes longer, especially when one stops in the big(ish) city en route to see if, just maybe, the shoe store has those shoes one was too stupid to buy when one saw them last month.  Not that this happened to me.  Uh, yeah.

I bought some foundation on the weekend, thinking it’s about time I made it a part of my daily routine.  I know, I know, no foundation?  I’m just lazy, and haven’t felt a burning need until recently.  I tried it on half my face yesterday afternoon, and then proceeded to have a conversation with the father of Austin’s friend when he came to take A to karate.  I’m sure he didn’t notice, but come on.  I have no dignity.

Upon arriving home yesterday, we discovered two spots where the goddamn fat dog had peed, and she’d also shit just for good measure.  This is the dog who will not ask to go out, unless you count standing around looking stupid as asking.  GRR.  Tonight I found a pile of cat shit in the bedroom - Cookie’s Official Protest as to the state of the kitty boxes - and the fat dog shit in the living room when I shooed her out of the bedroom so I could vacuum.  Fuuuuuck.  I swear, I’m an animal lover, but those two aren’t going to last much longer with the shitting & pissing in my house.  And they never use the fucking lino.  What is UP with THAT?!

The house has now been de-cluttered, the animal messes cleaned, the upstairs vacuumed, the bed stripped, and laundry started.  Fun times on a Tuesday night.

Oh, and as a final cherry on the top of my shit sundae, I’m sick.  AGAIN.

Travel With Children.

OY.

My youngest - aka Mr. Intensity - has issues with dentists.  Could be something to do with the abscess/sore and subsequent biopsy at 20 months, or maybe the removal of the tooth right next to the abscess/sore at 33 months, or perhaps the pink glop they used to take a new dental impression (kid should never have pulled off his damn spacer!) at 4 years of age.  Doesn’t matter - he’s officially saddled with issues.  He has 4 small cavities, and in order to have them filled, we need to visit a pediatric dentist.  I’m sure one can imagine how many of these are hanging around our little rural piece of BC.  Yeah, exactly none.

So, because I love him and am made of money (ha), we scheduled an appointment in Langley.  I got up at 4:45 yesterday morning, hustled the kids into the van by 5:50, and hit the road.  It’s a nice time of day to drive, aside from the fact that I couldn’t stop yawning, and got caught behind one too many 18 wheelers on big hills.  We arrived in Langley 2 hours early - yes, it’s possible that my foot is made of lead - and killed time by shopping.  Fun for me, torture for small children.

I rewarded them with McChuck’s (avec Play Place, the real reason we go there), and they were fine.  The appointment went well, and Jack will only require light oral sedation and laughing gas for his fillings.  Which won’t be done until the end of May, because my schedule is too fucking insane and I have a trip a month right now.  Oy.

Then it was off to that Swedish place to meet up with my seestor, and back to grandma & grandpa’s for a nap.  Said nap almost made me miss my girlie night with some wonderful women, but I made it.

The best part of all of this is that Jack is now ill.  High fever and choking croupy cough ILL.  Poor guy didn’t have a great sleep, but he’s showing signs of improvement this morning.

Overheard in my house.

Austin: Mom, can I have an MSN Messenger account?

Me: *blank look* (thinking: who the hell told him about MSN?) Um. Maybe?

Austin: ok. Soon, right?

Me: Ummmmmm.

**************

Jackson: (crying…er, wailing his fool head off about bedtime) I don’t want a hug!

Me: Ok, no problem.

Jackson: it’s because you’re SO MEAN to me!!

Me: Yup. (giggling, I leave the room & close the door).

30 seconds later:

Jack: Moooooommm! I need a hug!!

Me: I know.

Seriously, my 9 year old wants an MSN account? Gah. I was hoping to keep him off the internet - and my computer - for a bit longer. Oh well, I guess the first lesson is about internet safety. Woo.

The 5 yr old cracks me up. The wailing about bedtime and the unfairness of it all? He stopped about 2.4 minutes in. Because he passed out. Ha.

The home stretch.

5 more days.  5 more posts.  And then I can go back to posting every couple of days.  The pressure (such as it is) will be off!

It’s 7:17 am, and my children are still out cold.  Looks like I might have to wake them up this morning.  This is a rarity, believe me.

Ok.  Have woken them up.  Austin still doesn’t want to be awake.  Jack is eating.  Gotta go!

16 hours and counting.

That’s how long it’s been since I saw my children.  The neighbour’s sons are here for the weekend, and my two tend to not-so-mysteriously disappear when this happens.  They ran off at 4 yesterday afternoon, allowing me many hours of peace and quiet, which included a nice nap on the couch.

I hope to see them before I leave for the day, but who knows?  Last time they slept over, J was crying at our back door at 8:30 in the morning, without a goddamn coat on.  He’s definitely a momma’s boy, when he’s not being a little turd.

In even more exciting news, D should be home this afternoon!  Whee!  I haven’t seen him for more than 45 minutes in almost three weeks.  This living apart thing really sucks.  But the reunions are freaking great.

And they’re off.

Day 1.  I’m still wondering if I can make it all the way through…..

This morning has been stellar thus far:  Jackson had a meltdown because Austin received one of those candy rings and he didn’t.  Keep in mind that J hasn’t even dug through all his candy to see if he really didn’t get one.  Little shit.  I could happily sell him some days.

Also, every time I eat something, I feel sick almost immediately.  It’s brief, but really annoying.  It should be illegal to feel that way after eating chocolate*.

*no, I’m not eating chocolate yet this morning.  But it could happen.